Regardless of who you are, or what you’re into, I can pretty much guarantee you’re familiar with the base ten female rating scale.

The problem with this scale is every man has created his own definition of what each number represents. This is somewhat understandable as one man’s 2 can be another man’s 10. This is a quirk of life we should all be thankful for as every time a guy takes a dive we not only pull the grenade from the game, but it’s just one less guy to usurp in the field.

For this reason alone, any guy happily out hogging should be left to do so in peace. While you might not want to see your buddy leave with Jabba the Hut, he’s doing a service to everyone else in the game. Plus if that’s what gets him off, who are you to deprive him?

If you’re one of these men, then this scale is not for you personally, but as a point of reference to be used when talking to other Men. Nothing will label as an outcast quicker than claiming Rosie O’Donnell as the top of your celebrity fuck list.

Setting the Limits

The biggest mistake men make with the base ten rating scale is not applying hard limits. If your scale goes from 1-10, no girl can be an 11. This is science people, and in science everything has to fall on or within the limits of your scale.

This means a 1 has to be the ugliest girl in the world, and a 10 has to be the sexiest. If you label a girl as a 10, and then find a sexier girl who clearly trumps her, she will take the top slot, bumping everyone else down to their appropriate categories. You don’t add new numbers to scale or the entire thing becomes diluted and frivolous.

The Law of Averages

Since the straight sexual appeal of a girl is completely subjective, and every girl can move up or down the scale by a point or two depending on when and where you see them, the scale needs to be populated by the average score of the girl in question.

We’ve all taken home an 8 from the bar, only to wake up next to a 6. Thanks to high-heel shoes, low-cut tops, soft lips and hard drinks the girl’s original score can be greatly inflated. It’s up to you to take the average of the good, the bad and the ugly versions of the girl; then adjust her score accordingly.

I’ve known girls who walk around as a 6, but will turn every guy’s head once the sun has set and the girl has performed some sort of sex-appeal witchcraft in the hours before heading out. In a scenario like this with a 6-8 split it’s best to simply take the average and slot her in as a 7. This way your rating is always in the ballpark, regardless of the time of day.

Efficiency > Accuracy

The entire point of this scale is to have a quick, and accurate, way to rate girls and relay that rating to our friends. Accuracy is always important, but the subjectiveness of the scale makes it a waste of time to get too anal about the issue.

Focus on being efficient, and bend the rules when need be. Technically our top limit of 10 should be reserved exclusively for the hottest girl in the world. In reality, the 10 slot will fit for any of the hottest girls in the world. For example, it would stupid to spend the time trying to slot the girls below into their own rankings, when they can all be lumped into the top slot.

Pro Tip: If they’re an official Victoria’s Secret model, they’re a 10. Don’t bother putting more thought into it than that. To be honest, the difference between a 9 and a 10 is almost negligible. It really just comes down to public opinion. There are many models out there just as beautiful as the best Victoria’s Secret models, but it’s that “official” validation which puts them over the top.

Don’t Fear the Fraction

There are billions of girls in this world, and only 10 slots on our scale. You’re going to come across girls who just don’t fit well at any rank. In cases like this it’s fine to rock a fraction. That being said there are a couple of rules when it comes to female rating fractions.

Rule 1: Rounding

  • Any girl landing below the halfway point of two rankings must be rounded down to the lower ranking. For example a girl rated as a 7.3 would be relegated to a 7.
  • A .6 is always rounded down to .5

Rule 2: Mid or High

Referring back to Efficiency > Accuracy, it doesn’t make sense to fret over a girl being a 7.8 or a 7.9. If she’s more than midway, she’s simply a “high seven”. Trying to nail down an exact decimal is a waste of time.

In short: A girl is a 7, a 7.5 or a high 7. Any other options are frivolous.

Don’t Waste Time below the Median

If a girl is less than a 5, she’s not worth the energy of slotting into the scale on the fly. Slots 1-4 are there in case you need them, but when you’re in the game those girls are simply not worth the ink. Then again if you’re lucky enough to come across a legitimate 1, that’s definitely something worth taking note.

I’m not sure who or what the ugliest girl in the world would look like, but I’m pretty sure it’s epic-as-fuck. In fact if you come across it, take a picture and ship it my way. You can get at me on twitter or email me.

A Quick Visual Guide of How To Rate Girls

10 – The HOttest girl(s) in the world.

9 – Hot enough to make a good living off modelling, or gold digging.

8 – The hottest “regular girls” you’ll see around. Typically the highest ranking pull obtainable by the regular Joe.

7 – You’d take her home on a slow night, but she would never be your first choice.

6 – Will do in a pinch, but you’ll want to go in armed with a paper bag and an excuse to bounce ASAP. Nnot a girl you want to eat breakfast with.

5 – You better be drunk, and make sure none of your friends sees you leaving with this one. In fact you’ll often have a better time in your basement with a warm towel and some hand lotion.

4 – No.

3 – Ohh god, no!

2 – You’re kidding? She clearly has hooves.

1 – I hope you’re at a circus.

There you have it; the finer workings of the base ten ranking scale. It’s up to you to decide where your range of acceptability fits. Where you put your personal basement is up to you, just know this: this is the way the scale works, it is how girls are judged, and depending on the girls you spend time with it is how you will be judged.

If you’re happy below the median, that’s your choice. Just be prepared to weather the bro-back.

A Note from the Author

Some people have taken exception to, and gotten upset by, this article. Instead of replying to you all individually I have written a response as to why this was written, it’s purpose, and why it has not been removed.

Why I wrote How to Rate Girls

Please read this before choosing to email me any hate mail. Thank you.